Not had time to read all of this ( or can't be arsed) but here goes.
I always find myself thinking she can look a bit harsh, matronly or dominate even in some photographs, in a bobfoc (body off baywatch, face off crime watch) milfy kind of way and at other more sensitive, reflective momments when my innerself shines threw think ah well many a good tune played on an old fiddle and she will get me Andy's autogragh if nothing else.
And to be honest if I look in the darkest reaches of my soul I could most probably do with being disciplined for of the transgressions I have unwittingly committed

But at the back of my mind I would always be thinking she will be marking me on my "ground strokes" and "backhand" so to speak, so as Duncan Bannatyne from dragons den would say (no pun intended) I'm out.
Note: this thread needs a poll.